Are you the Type of Woman that Men Desire?

Good Question! I could not answer it right away mostly because I haven't looked at myself as dating material in quite some time.  Dating has been on the back burner for a year now. 

However....lately.... something is stirring within...I think I'm ready to date again, maybe.  I didn't write the following article.  Hopefully, you'll find it informative, personally I already know that dressing a little better for errands is in order. :)

Figuring out what men really desire is never easy, since men come in different variations. However, regardless of what category a man falls in, there are standard things that every man is looking for in a woman. Are you the type of woman that men dream about being with? We all want to be an object of desire- the kind of woman that men talk about, dream about and long to be with. We all want to be chased and admired by men and to be appreciated, respected and admired for our existence, appearance, personality and accomplishments.

So what do men really desire in a woman and are you that woman? Well, the first and most important thing to remember is to:
Be Real- be who you really are, rather than try to be what you think you should be or who you think people want you to be. It is easy to sense a real person from an artificial one and one of the main turn offs for a man is a woman who is not herself and gives off a fake vibe.
Have Confidence: Nothing is more attractive to a man than a woman who is confident and feels comfortable and happy in her skin. A woman who feels good about herself is a woman most likely with a good head on her shoulders, rational, focused and has good direction in life. If a woman does not have confidence in herself, then a man feels and sees no reason to have confidence in either and he will not want to invest his time and effort in a woman he will have to baby sit emotionally all the time.
Dress Fashionably: Wearing the most expensive apparel is not the most important thing to a man, but it is important that a woman keep up with her appearances. A woman who dresses sharply comes off as a woman who is successful and who treats herself with love and respect and therefore a man will not want to do less for her either- he will love and respect you too. So be sure to keep yourself updated with fashion and keep yourself well groomed. This will not only draw men to you, but you will also feel good about yourself- which is the first priority before you please anyone else! And remember, dress sexy, but classy as well- and always leave something to the imagination.
Express Intellect - Being desirable to a man is not just about having a pretty face or shapely figure. A woman with intelligence is important to and a man wants to be with a woman who will have something to talk about and who will teach him new things, just as he will teach you new things. Everyone is unique and has their own personal talents and areas of higher intelligence than others- so be sure to express that side of yourself to prove that you do have the whole package- an attractive appearance along with other intellectual surprises. Share your hobbies, share things you have learned through your life experiences and show what he has been missing out on before he met you!
Be Sweet and Feminine - Okay, today women are more independent and career oriented, but that does not mean we should have to give up and forget our feminine roots. Women are delicate creatures after all- we are sweet and giving and it is important for a man to see these qualities in a woman. It is not weak to show a man that you are sweet and care taking- after all, this is the type of woman a man dreams coming home to- someone who will lovingly welcome him home with a sweet feminine smile and take care of him. Never lose your special feminine roots- show him your sweet and romantic side.
Tell him what you want - It is understandable that you want a man who will treat you beautifully without you having to give him directions- and you should never lower your standards when it comes to this. However, you also have to remember that men cannot read minds and let us face it- we women are often emotionally unpredictable creatures and are not always easy to read. Men love it when a woman has the strength and confidence to tell him what she wants. Men want to please women, sp do not be afraid to open up and let him know what it is important to you.
Stay Glamorous - This does not mean that you should walk on eggshells and worry about your looks all the time. You should feel secure enough in your relationship to know that even when you are not made up, your man will still adore you and will not look at other women. However, this does not mean you should let yourself go and not care about the things that were once important to you. Relationship usually start going downhill when one or both partners stop caring about the little things, such as dressing up for each other, little romantic gestures and so on. So, remember the little things and always keep your self-confidence in tune by taking care of yourself- and your partner will automatically keep admiring you!
Like Your Body - Men love a woman who loves her body. A woman who walks around feeling good about her body and knowing that her body is beautiful is incredibly sexy to a man and make him curious and eager to get to know that woman. So be sure to build your physical confidence and focus on bringing out your best features. Nobody is prefect- everyone has flaws, but that does not mean that you should advertise your flaws. Get to know yourself and find your strong physical points and bring them out for the world to see and admire. If there are parts of your body that you believe could use some help, then do something about rather than complain.

The Art of Being Single

Ten years ago, I started The Art of Being Single because I wanted to meet people.  I wanted to meet single people and  always thought the best way was at cocktail parties, in an atmosphere among friends. Problem was nobody was having any or I wasn't invited if they did.  So I started my own. I rented space at a beautiful art gallery and made all the arrangements.  Announcements were sent to my friends in hopes they would pass it on to their single friends...and they did.  84 people showed up at the very first cocktail party.  The catchy thing was you had to invite someone of the opposite sex to attend.  You didn't have to walk in with that person, just commit to inviting someone to help balance out the ratio of men and women..."it's like bringing a dish to share!".  It was beautiful.  Fresh flowers, live music, appetizers, wine, beer and laughter.  The sight of people enjoying themselves, comfortably.

I didn't expect this venture to turn into a business.  The Art of Being Single set the scene for singles in the Triangle for over 2 1/2 years and became widely known in the area with over 1800 people on the mailing list.

I met someone through the events and wanted to spend time on my relationship with him and other areas of my life.  I put The Art of Being Single on hold and now, 7 years later, I feel the need to start them again.  It's unfortunate that the single population never lets up.  For one reason or another, people find themselves single, whether they wanted it or not.  It's a tough place to be in.  We aren't meant to be alone and there is no control over when love will enter your life again.  So making the best of your time while single is the best thing to do.

I'm going to make a second posting to this announcement explaining more about The Art of Being Single.  For now, I just wanted to get the info up and out.  Contact ABS on FaceBook.  Like the page, suggest to friends and Join the Mailing list on the facebook page (under profile picture).  You can contact me with any questions.  Shelle McCollum

From Mike Robbins

A few weeks ago I listened to a radio interview with Michael Beckwith, author of "Spiritual Liberation," and he said, "A bad day for the ego is a good day for the soul." When I heard this I laughed out loud. The wisdom of his statement resonated with me deeply. I thought about a number of experiences in my life which have been quite "bad" for my ego (i.e., embarrassing, disappointing or even painful), but in hindsight have been great for my own growth and development.

Over this past week, I've had two specific situations, one in the middle of a seminar with one of my clients and another in a personal conversation, where I felt embarrassed -- things didn't turn out at all how I wanted them to and it seemed like I messed up. As I experienced these situations and have been reflecting on them, although I didn't like how they unfolded, I recognize that the discomfort involved in both instances was about me protecting my ego (in other words -- wanting to look good or at least not to look bad).

In retrospect, I'm grateful that both of these things happened exactly as they did. They were and continue to be good opportunities for me to learn, grow, and evolve -- both in my work and my life.

Too often our desire to protect our ego -- to avoid failure and embarrassment -- causes us to sell ourselves out, not go for what we truly want, or hold back in a variety of detrimental ways. When we remember that even if things don't turn out the way we think we want them to, not only will we survive, we can grow in the process. As the saying goes, "if it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger."

This is not to say that the only way to grow, evolve, and transform in life is through suffering, disappointment or pain. However, when we do experience difficulties, failures, and challenges -- all of which are normal and natural aspects of life and growth -- we have the capacity to turn these "bad" things into incredible opportunities for healing and transformation. While it may not seem that way to us (or our ego) initially, the deeper part of who we are (our soul) knows that everything happens for a reason and there are always important lessons for us to learn in each situation and experience in life.

Think of some of the things that have happened in your life that seemed "awful" to you at the time, but in hindsight are things you're incredibly grateful for now.

The most elegant, pleasurable, and self-loving way for us to grow and evolve is through joy, success and gratitude. However, due to the fact that difficulties do occur in life and that we often give away our power to the "bad" stuff (through resistance, judgment or worry), learning to relate to our challenges in a more positive and conscious way is a crucial part of our growth journey.

Remembering that what's usually at risk in life when we get scared is just our ego, can remind us, with compassion, that we don't have nearly as much to lose as we think we do. Embodying this insight (that a bad day for our ego is a good day for our soul) with empathy and perspective, allows us to live our lives with a deeper sense of forgiveness, faith and authenticity.

***

Mike Robbins is a sought-after motivational keynote speaker, coach, and the bestselling author of "Focus on the Good Stuff" (Wiley) and "Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken" (Wiley). More info - www.Mike-Robbins.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

I enjoyed this article. You can read the entire piece by clicking link at end of post. 
It's a good read, insightful and useful.

8 Things Everybody Ought to Know About Concentrating

8 Things Everybody Ought to Know About Concentrating

1. You can’t start concentrating until you’ve stopped getting distracted

The phrase above is self-explanatory. Yet, it’s amazing how most people look for some crazy, obtuse solution for the reason why they can’t concentrate. They reason, “I just have ADD. I can’t concentrate.” In reality, their situation likens itself to Mike’s situation above.
In the late 80′s, two researchers asked themselves a chicken-egg question. (“What came first the chicken or the egg?”). Their version centers on distraction and boredom. They asked themselves, “What came first, distraction or boredom.” What they found is rather subtle, yet it’s profoundly significant. They found that distraction leads to boredom (not the other way around). This displays that we must cut out distraction in order to get focused; or else, we’ll get bored.

2. Just do one important thing per day

Scientists also found that we can only focus on one thing at once. Nobody does that. We’ve always got something going on in the background of whatever we’re doing. We’ve always got two-dozen tasks on our to-do list. On top of this, we’ve got a handful of projects that we try and finish simultaneously.
When you’ve got a mountain of paperwork on your desk, the best thing to do is clear it all off. Pick it all up and place it in a drawer. Do anything required to get it out of your sight. After this, kick your feet up and daydream. Yes, I’m serious. Daydream and ask yourself the following question: “What’s the most important thing I can do right now?” Once you’ve identified the item that will actually make a difference, do it.
Try and make it a goal to do just one critical thing per day. This habit proves much more effective than living the routine everyone else lives: doing many insignificant things a day. They live on fooling themselves into thinking they’ve added value.
The quote below by John Wooden summarizes this quite nicely. Recall upon this daily if you’re having a difficult time breaking away from the ineffective lifestyle.

“Don’t mistake activity for achievement.” – John Wooden

Read the entire article

Sit still & be quiet

Sit still and be quiet. So simple to say, yet the inability is among many of us. These beautiful animals sit quietly and peacefully.  It's intuitive for them to be true to their nature. We have the same gift, however, where they surrender to their peaceful nature, we have the unfortunate freedom to fight it.

These are definitions of focus:

~Webster definition:  the concentration of attention or energy on something
~Tunnel vision defined:  a condition in which peripheral vision is greatly restricted
~Briany Quote Tony Robbins:  One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want is that we never direct our focus; we never concentrate our power. Most people dabble their way through life, never deciding to master anything in particular.

Why do people have trouble sitting still and being quiet?

~some maybe afraid of what they'll find.
      “It's a sad man my friend who's livin' in his own skin and can't stand the company"
~Afraid of the responsibility of realizing his purpose and not ready to live it.
~Afraid, for no other reason than not having self control.

True silence is the rest of the mind; it is to the spirit what sleep is to the body, nourishment and refreshment.  ~William Penn

Sitting still actually feels unnatural in the beginning, but you'll come to love it.
Sometimes, playing non vocal music helps ease the transition while you find your center.
Try not to think about time, just sit.
Sit in a place you enjoy.  I sit in front of a window and face the sun.  Doing that has improved my experience.
If your mind is racing, stop and write your thoughts down, then bring yourself back to center.
Your mind will wander softly, but if it starts to think about random things, I bring my focus to my heart area.   My chest, heart area is what I identify as my center, that way when I need to control random thinking I can take deeper breaths focusing on that area and it helps block out distraction.
Sometimes, as you sit quietly, your mind shows you things and brings an awareness.
Sitting still is so important to getting a clear vision of where you are.  It's an opportunity during the day to be true to your nature, to recharge your energy and to feel the honesty of your feelings.

We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness.  God is the friend of silence.  See how nature - trees, flowers, grass - grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence.... We need silence to be able to touch souls. ~Mother Teresa

Sitting still & being quiet
               Breathing
                        and just being
                                     is vital to your body

Taking the blog on a test drive

This is my first experience at blogging.  It's exciting to have this platform to express yourself and/or business.  The sole purpose for a High Road Coaching blog is to offer inspiration and information regarding everyday life.  My most favorite thing to learn about are the experiences and stories of other people.  Heartfelt, real, funny, the kind that touch a nerve or speak to us.  I especially like to share what I've learned.  So within this blog, you'll find written words that belong to others.  Only they can tell their story.  High Road Coaching is all about enhancing life...making the best with the rest!